It's the Little Things: Everyday Interactions That Anger, Annoy, and Divide the Races by Lena Williams
I started this book in the fall of 2001, and for some reason I put it down about half way through reading it. I am the kind of guy who is consistently reading 3 or 4 books at any given time, but I recently made a commitment that I wouldn't start any new books until I finished the ones I have started and left hanging. I also made a deal with my wife that whenever i purchase new books, i have to get rid of some other ones in my library. For those of you who have never seen it, I have a very large library, although it is shrinking constantly because I am trying to get rid of books that I have read or will never read so that others can take advantage of them.
To the book. I have always been intrigued, fascinated, and enjoyed the diversity of God's people. I am so thankful for my parents who did not allow me to be tainted by prejudice or racism.
My best friend since I was eleven years old and to this day is black, and my parents never once mentioned that there would be anything even remotely foreign about such a concept.
My first girlfriend was black, and when I informed my parents, once again not one negative thing came out of their mouths to me about it. The first time I ever heard any notion that something was remotely strange (not to me, but to others in out society) was when I, as a 13 year old kid, made mention that we were going to get married some day (Ahh! Puppy Love!), and someone told me that if I married a black girl they would not come to my wedding.
I was crushed because this was someone I really looked up to. I was totally confused. I couldn't understand where that kind of statement had come from. That was the first time my parents sat me dawn and explained that unfortunately some people had a way of thinking that people who were different should not be associated in any kind of romantic way. They reaffirmed that that was snot their stance, and that it should not be mine either - that God had created all people equally.
So, when I saw this book seven years ago, I thought the title was quite intriguing and picked it up. As I read, I kept noticing that the majority of the experiences in the book were focused on blacks, not whites. The author notes that, unfortunately, this is true. She says, "I had hoped to get white Americans to open up and bear their souls about race and race relations in America" but that finding them was more difficult than she anticipated. She quotes Dr. Alvin Poussaint who says, "Whites do not have the vast experiences with race that many blacks have, so it is difficult for them to talk about racial prejudice without appearing naive and uninformed" (p. 274).
Perhaps the thing that I was most looking forward to, after hearing story after story after story about racial prejudices and injustices, were possible solutions or ideas to begin working toward reconciliation and authentic healing. To this query, Williams says, "Believe me, if I had the answers, I'd go tell it on the mountain, over the hills, and everywhere. But I don't" (p. 274). She confesses that she wrote the book ti get people to react, not to respond with indifference. "What I aspired to do in writing the book was to get people talking among themselves, families, coworkers, and friends about the things we do and say behind closed doors, about the reasons why these century-old stereotypes still exist, and about what we as individuals can do about race beyond blaming institutions" (p. 275).
I read this book in my own private reading time. Had I read it with a group, perhaps more dialogue would have been fostered, but I would welcome some comments and discussions here on the blog. Let me know what you think.
I picked this book up at the recommendation of a respected friend. I don't generally read a lot of business books, but I am making an intentional effort to diversify my reading some.
